Why I Teach My Children So Much Math

People sometimes ask me why I’m teaching so much mathematics to my children, especially when they sometimes complain about it. The answer is rooted in one of my deepest regrets as a parent—and in what I believe is one of the most important gifts I can give them.

Mathematics as a Language

I think of mathematics as a language, much like Spanish, Mandarin, or French. Not metaphorically, but literally: mathematics is a language with its own grammar, vocabulary, and ways of expressing ideas about the world.

Research supports this view. Studies show that mathematical language development in early childhood predicts later mathematical achievement,¹ and linguistic skills consistently and strongly predict early mathematical abilities.² The cognitive processes children use to learn mathematics closely parallel those used in language acquisition.

The Window I Missed

I never successfully learned foreign languages in school. Perhaps it was a learning difficulty. Perhaps I never saw them as useful. Perhaps I started too late. Whatever the reason, that window has largely closed for me now.

The research on critical periods for language acquisition tells us that while adults can learn new languages, children acquire them with a naturalness and fluency that becomes increasingly difficult after early adolescence.³ The brain’s plasticity for language learning peaks in early childhood and gradually declines.

One of my major regrets—perhaps my greatest shortcoming as a parent—is that my children haven’t grown up in a non-English-speaking environment. I can’t give them the gift of multiple native languages. I can’t give them Spanish or Mandarin as a mother tongue. But I can give them mathematics.

The Suzuki Approach to Mathematics

The Suzuki method of music education is based on the “mother tongue approach”—the observation that all children learn to speak their native language with relative ease through immersion, repetition, and a nurturing environment. Dr. Shinichi Suzuki asked: if children can learn to speak through this natural process, why can’t they learn music—or mathematics—the same way?⁴

As Suzuki himself noted, the same principles have been successfully applied to mathematics: early exposure, consistent practice, positive reinforcement, and treating mathematical thinking not as a special talent but as a natural human capacity that can be developed through the right environment.⁵

My goal is simple: if I can build mathematical fluency early enough, my children will be able to think and reason natively in mathematics. Not as a foreign language they struggle to translate, but as a natural mode of thought.

Why Early, and Why So Much?

The research is clear: early mathematical proficiency has both immediate and long-lasting benefits.

Cognitive Advantages

Mathematical fluency frees up working memory for higher-order thinking.⁶ When children don’t have to struggle with basic operations, they have mental space to:

Structure complex word problems
Model solutions creatively
Reason about abstract relationships
See patterns and make connections

Students with strong mathematical fluency are better equipped to learn algebra, solve complex problems, and reason with advanced concepts.⁷ The foundation built in early childhood supports mathematical thinking throughout life.

Long-Term Outcomes

Early mathematics skills predict not just later math achievement, but also success in reading, science, and overall academic attainment.⁸ Some studies even link mathematical fluency to long-term outcomes like educational attainment and income.⁹

More remarkably, early mathematical interventions can have effects that persist years after the intervention ends. One study found gains equivalent to 0.8 grade levels in math achievement three years after a cognitive acceleration program finished.¹⁰ Another study found that math app interventions closed achievement gaps, with effects persisting even after families stopped using the app.¹¹

Saving Them Trouble Later

High school and college mathematics are where many students hit a wall—not because the concepts are inherently beyond them, but because they lack the foundational fluency to build on. They’re trying to learn calculus while still translating basic algebra, like someone trying to read Cervantes while still sounding out words.

My hope is to make advanced mathematics as natural as speaking. Not effortless—learning is never effortless—but accessible. Native. A way of thinking, not a painful translation process.

“But They Say They Hate It”

My children sometimes say they hate math. I hear them. And honestly? I don’t particularly care.

That sounds harsh. Let me explain why it’s not.

First, children often say they hate things that are challenging or frustrating,¹² not things they inherently dislike. What they’re really saying is: “This is hard. I’m confused. I’m not confident.” These are normal responses to learning something difficult.

Second, attitudes toward mathematics are not fixed—they change as competence grows. Research shows a bidirectional relationship: as children become more confident, they enjoy math more; enjoying math leads to more practice; more practice leads to greater achievement.¹³ The attitude follows the competence.

Third, I’m not asking them to love it right now. I’m asking them to develop fluency that will serve them for life. My hope is that someday—perhaps in high school when mathematics clicks into place, perhaps in college when they’re building models or analyzing data, perhaps later in careers where quantitative thinking opens doors—they’ll look back and say, “Oh. That’s why Dad insisted.”

The Long View

I’m not teaching my children mathematics to make them mathematicians (though that would be wonderful if they chose it). I’m teaching them a language for reasoning about the world—for understanding change, pattern, structure, and relationship.

I’m trying to give them what I couldn’t give them in Spanish or Mandarin: a native fluency in a powerful way of thinking.

Will they thank me for it? Maybe not for years. Maybe never. But I believe—supported by decades of research on early learning, cognitive development, and mathematical education—that I’m giving them tools they’ll use for the rest of their lives, whether they realize it or not.

Mathematics isn’t just arithmetic. It’s not just algebra or calculus. It’s a way of seeing the world, of solving problems, of thinking precisely about complex ideas. It’s a language. And like any language, it’s best learned early, practiced daily, and built into the fabric of how you think.

That’s why I teach my children so much math. Not because I expect perfection. Not because I demand they love it. But because I want them to speak it fluently—to have this language available to them as naturally as English, ready to use whenever they need it.

And if someday they look back and appreciate it, that will be enough.